


CPS Verse

by waterbird13



Series: Tumblr Fics [96]
Category: supernautral
Genre: AU, Anxiety, Brief suicidal ideation, Building Relationship, Family, Foster Care, Hurt/Comfort, John Winchester skeptical, John Winchester's A+ Parenting, M/M, Therapy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-06
Updated: 2016-08-06
Packaged: 2018-07-29 17:48:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 5,674
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7693738
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/waterbird13/pseuds/waterbird13
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam gets grabbed by CPS. He fights at first, but then they bring him to the Lafittes, and that changes everything. Mr. and Mrs. Lafitte are so nice and actually seem to give a fuck, and their son...Sam's pretty sure Benny is one of the best things that's ever happened to him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is a verse I'm moving from Tumblr. It's incomplete, and if people prompt more when prompts are open, I'll add more pieces.
> 
> Warnings: It's an AU. Sam's in foster care. Two foster brothers eventually fall in love. John Winchester is portrayed badly, Dean Winchester is not always the best person. This is hurt/comfort.

Dad and Dean would expect Sam to fight, so Sam does. He tries to escape, but he’s never been as talented as Dean, as determined, as good, and the people grab him back each time.

It takes a few days for them to drop him at the Lafitte’s place. They tell Sam these people will take care of him, show him what a real family is like. Sam just smiles to himself. It’ll be easier to escape some family’s place. They’re just a bunch of civilians.

They are just a bunch of civilians, and they have no more security than the baseball bat Mr. Lafitte keeps under his side of his bed and the hopelessly feeble locks on the door. But Sam doesn’t leave.

He’s a shame to his family, and he knows it. But something makes him stay.

Maybe it’s the hot, homemade meal Mrs. Lafitte puts in front of him soon after he arrives, asking to know what he likes to eat. Maybe it’s the way they don’t try to touch him, the way they smile without it looking creepy. Maybe it’s the way Mr. Lafitte talks right away about him getting enrolled in school, says he’s seen Sam’s grades, knows how smart Sam is, wonders what he could do with some stability. Maybe it’s the way they ask if he still likes to act, or play soccer, and assures him he can, here.

They don’t try to talk about his family, either, and Sam appreciates that. It’s easier to ignore the crippling guilt if they don’t talk about it.

But more than anything, Sam thinks, it’s their teenage son, Benny.

Well, stepson. Benny came to them like Sam did, only he was only a kid at the time and they decided they wanted to keep him. Maybe they’ll keep Sam too, but then again Sam is just past sixteen and will be out of the system in two years. Probably, he’ll have to go back to his family.

But Benny is their kid, and he’s a year older than Sam. He has the room next to Sam’s and always seems to be there. He’s nice, and has a big, attention-getting smile. He’s always trying to feed Sam or get him to play video games or something like that. Sam doesn’t know what to do with that kind of attention, but he can’t say he doesn’t like it.

Benny goes to the local high school too, only he’s a wrestler, not a soccer player. He doesn’t act, either, but he always waits for Sam so he can drive them both home, even if Sam has rehearsal until four or five.

Sam’s just a background actor, just there to fill space, really, but it was his first audition and he’s been here less than a month, so he’s more than happy with it. Acting is kind of fun. He’d almost forgotten that.

When the director lets them go at quarter past four, Sam walks up to the library, pushing open the door to find Benny the only student left, scribbling away in his science notebook. Sam knows it’s science because Benny hates science, and only makes that face when confronted by the dreaded subject.

Sam sits down next to him and reads over his shoulder, correcting a physics problem quietly, hoping the help is welcome. People usually like someone else helping out with their homework, but maybe Benny is the proud type and Sam will just piss him off.

Benny looks at it, erases it, and starts again. “How’d ya know that?” he asks after a minute. “Ya haven’t taken this class.”

Sam shrugs. “One of my old schools,” he says. “Curriculums are different all over the country.”

“Right,” Benny says, closing his notebook even though he hasn’t finished the problem. “You’ve been to a lotta schools. How many?”

Sam shrugs again. He couldn’t keep count. 

“You miss it?” Benny asks.

“Not the changing schools,” Sam says. “Or the moving. Or losing friends, or–” he cuts off, eyes stinging a bit. This is the closest to the topic anyone’s gotten yet.

“But ya miss your family, huh?” Benny asks, reaching out a hand to hold Sam’s. “It’s okay if ya do, Sam.”

“They say they’re bad for me,” Sam says softly.

“What d’you think?” Benny presses.

“They probably were,” Sam admits. “I mean, Dad would leave for weeks, sometimes months. Just me and Dean. Sometimes just me. Never enough money for food and rent. And he–he trained us. To be soldiers. He gave me a gun when I was nine, Benny. And we always moved, all the time. It–it wasn’t good. But–they’re family. I love them.”

“You wanna go back?” Benny asks.

Sam shakes his head. It’s shameful to admit, but he does it. “I never knew…somewhere could be like this,” he admits.

Benny squeezes the hand he’s still holding. “It always will be,” he promises. “Mom an’ Dad are nice, Sam. An’ I’m more than happy to have you around.”

Sam’s pretty happy to be around Benny, honestly. He doesn’t know what this is, but Benny isn’t his brother like Dean is. He’s pretty sure Benny isn’t his brother at all, even if they are foster brothers. 

“Ready to go home?” Benny asks, using his free hand to shove his science stuff back into his bag.

Sam nods. _Home._  Their home. His home, now.

Benny doesn’t let go of his hand until they need to separate to get into Benny’s truck.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Winchesters want Sam back

They’re waiting at the end of the driveway when Sam and Benny make it home from school on a Friday.

Sam would like to say it’s because they know they’re legally not allowed on the Lafitte’s property, that Mrs. Lafitte will grab her shotgun and call the police. Sam would like to say that. But Winchesters aren’t afraid of shotguns or the police or CPS regulations.

No, they’re at the end of the driveway so they can grab Sam and leave as fast as possible.

It’s been fifteen weeks. So long without seeing his brother, and Sam aches at the sight of the so familiar face. But then Benny puts his hand on the small of Sam’s back, and Sam remembers where he is. He is with Benny, coming home from a full day of school, the school he’s attended for almost four months solid. Mrs. Lafitte will have apples sliced for them, because apparently apples help growing boys stay strong, and they will do their homework in the living room while she makes dinner.

It’s the crashing together of two very different homes, and Sam’s head is left spinning.

“’Bout time,” John Winchester says, like Sam came home an hour late from school, like CPS didn’t grab him four months before. “I see your just as useless at taking care of yourself as ever, but we can’t wait around anymore. There’s a job in Michigan.”

A job. There’s always a job. And there’s no use for Sam, unless there’s a job they can’t cover on their own.

Sam chances a look at his brother, but then looks away fast. He can’t read Dean’s expression, but it’s nothing good. Too expectant and hopeful, and Sam can’t bare to crush his heart.

Maybe he should go back. It’s what Dean would want. They came all this way for him.

Benny runs the hand on Sam’s back over to squeeze his hip. “I’m Benny, Benny Lafitte,” Benny drawls. “An’ Sam lives with me an’ my folks now, and we ain’t so keen to give him up.”

Sam freezes, because Benny is just seventeen years old, filling out but not a man yet, and John Winchester does not take rejection well. Sam holds his breath.

John steps closer. “Sam’s my son,” he snarls, voice low and cold. “And I’ll take him where I want.”

“No, I don’t think you will,” Benny says, and his voice still sounds pleasant even if it’s backed in a steel most guys twice Benny’s age don’t have. “Sam’s away from you now. You lay a hand on him, I guarantee my momma will be out here with her shotgun and the police in under a minute.”

“C’mon, Sammy,” Dean interrupts. “Stop fooling around. Let’s head out. Work to be done.”

Sam doesn’t move.

“Sam,” Dean says, impatient now. “C’mon. We’re back together. That’s awesome, right? We’ll get some ice cream, celebrate or something, then go do this job.”

Sam finally shakes his head.

“Sammy?” Dean asks, stepping forward. Sam steps back, pressing into Benny. Benny squeezes Sam’s hip.

“I don’t wanna go,” Sam says quietly.

“You’d abandon this family?” John barks.

Sam shakes his head, but looks at his brother, not John. “I–I don’t want to lose you, but–if I have to–I don’t want to go,” he says.

Dean won’t look at him.

John looks furious, ready to grab Sam and run. Sam tenses, but knows if it came to a fight, there is no way he could take both of them. Benny could swing a few good punches, but Sam doesn’t want Benny involved. Benny doesn’t deserve to be in Winchester family drama.

A shotgun fires into the air. “Get away from my kids,” Mrs. Lafitte snarls. “I’ve called the damn police.”

Sam and Benny dart past John and Dean while they’re distracted. Benny’s car is still at the end of the driveway, but that’s really the least of their concerns.

Dean and John glare, but decide to bail before the police show.

Sam watches them leave, then curls up on the chair on the porch. Benny pulls him close, until Sam is practically sitting in his lap. “It’s okay, you’re okay,” he murmurs for what feels like hours while Sam shakes.

Sam manages to slow the shakes, but Benny is still rubbing his back. “You really wanna stay?” Benny asks.

Sam nods tiredly. “Said I did.”

“I know, but…you told ‘em to leave you behind,” Benny says.

Sam squirms, wondering if he made the wrong call, if Benny now pities the poor idiot who couldn’t figure out to leave before he wore out his welcome, to take what family he has and be grateful for it.

Benny kisses the top of Sam’s head. “I’m damn proud of you,” he whispers. “An’ I’m more than happy to have you. Forever.”

He keeps holding Sam, and with his touches and his words and his overall effort, Sam becomes more assured of his convictions.

Being here, with the Lafittes, with _Benny,_ is the right choice. It’s always been the right choice, and Sam won’t regret making it.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean tries to get Sam back.

Sam turns seventeen today, and there’s a cake.

He’s had a cake before, a little thing from the gas station mini-mart, maybe a slice from a diner display. Not every year, but often enough.

This is different.

Mrs. Lafitte baked it herself. Mr. Lafitte makes an amazing sugar icing that’s absolutely dripping down the sides. Benny cuts the cake, giving Sam a slice the size of his head.

Sam didn’t know birthdays could be like this.

He’s halfway through the cake–which is saying something, even after the huge dinner of chicken and rice they had–when the doorbell rings.

Everyone looks at each other. “Are you expecting anyone?” Mr. Lafitte asks carefully. No one nods.

So naturally, they all go for the door. And when Mrs. Lafitte opens it, it’s Dean standing on the other side.

Sam’s heart leaps into his throat. Dean, here, on his birthday. He has Benny and Dean and the Lafittes and no Dad. It must truly be the best birthday ever.

“Dean,” he says hopefully.

Dean grins, slow and easy, and maybe that should set Sam off, because he’s seen Dean use that to con a mark before. Still, he’s just so happy to see _Dean_ , he doesn’t think much.

“Hiya, Sammy,” he says.

No one else seems to be relaxing. In fact, everyone else is just more tense now. Sam wants to yell at them, because this is Dean, but then Dean opens his mouth.

“Time to go, Sammy,” he says.

“What?”

Dean jerks his head. “Go. Let’s go. Joke’s gone on long enough. And today, you really should be with family, huh?”

“He _is_  with family,” Benny growls.

Dean rolls his eyes. “Not with his fake family. Blood means something, pal. And Sam knows that.”

Sam’s certainly heard it before. “I don’t…I don’t want to go,” he says softly.

Dean rolls his eyes again. “Sammy, stop being a child. Let’s go.”

“Don’t know what’s childish about takin’ care of yourself,” Mr. Lafitte snaps. “Sam’s making sure he’s safe and healthy. And that’s right.”

“I’m not leaving,” he says, voice stronger this time. Then it fades again. “I wish you were here for my birthday.”

“I _am_ ,” Dean says, clearly frustrated.

Sam shakes his head. “You’re here because Dad wants me fetched. Like a gun or something to pull out of storage. And I’m not going.”

“People will die,” Dean snaps.

“Other hunters can help,” Sam says. “I’m a kid, Dean. I deserve to live too.”

“I’d suggest getting gone before I call the cops,” Mrs. Lafitte suggests.

Dean glares but turns tail, leaving everyone awkwardly standing in the doorway.

“Another slice of cake?” Mrs. Lafitte offers suddenly.

Sam’s still not even sure if he can finish his first, but he appreciates the gesture nonetheless. It means he’s cared for, and while the novelty of that’s wearing out, Sam doubts he’ll ever be less thankful, less happy here.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John does his level best to get Sam back.

It’s really not that hard.

John grabs him after school.

It’s actually lucky, maybe. Sam usually waits for Benny in the library, while Benny’s at wrestling practice, if Sam doesn’t have something of his own that day. But it’s such a nice day, and there are benches outside. Sam thought he’d get some of his reading done out there.

And then John had shown up. Sam’s grown over the last few months, actually, but he’s still pretty small. No match for his Dad, not when John has the element of surprise.

He gets Sam halfway to the truck, Sam kicking and screaming the whole way, and Sam fuzzily thinks that someone should be around. Somewhere. It’s a school, it’s only three fifteen.

“Stop it, Sam!” John snaps. “It’s time to come home. I’ve put up with this long enough. Stop whining like a little brat, your brother is waiting for us.”

Sam doesn’t stop. He’s not even really processing what John is saying, but even if he was, he wouldn’t stop. He’s not a hunter. Not anymore. The Lafitte’s have given him a chance to be something else, and he’s seizing it with both hands.

“Hey!” 

John doesn’t stop, although Sam does freeze for a second. That’s Benny. Benny, who’s strong and a great wrestler but no match for John Winchester. 

“Mr. Franks has already called the cops,” Benny shouts. “They’re gonna arrest you if you don’t clear out right now. If you take Sam, they’ll chase ya to the ends of the damn earth. My parents will make sure of that.”

John sneers. “No one cares about one damn foster kid. ‘Specially not when his real parent has him. Haven’t you heard, kid? The law is all ‘bout reuniting families.”

“You’re not his family,” Benny snaps. “You’re an asshole. And we want him. We care. Let him go.”

John’s distracted enough for Sam to use what he knows–ironically things John taught him–to get free. Elbows flying, body twisting, Sam makes his way free.

He’s most of the way over to Benny before he realizes the entire wrestling team is there, behind Benny, clearly ready for this to turn into a fight.

“Bet the police’ll be here any second,” one of them shouts helpfully, and that spurs John back to his car.

Benny grabs Sam up and holds him close. “”S’okay,” he mutters. “You’re good.”

Sam doesn’t want to let go. Even in front of the others, he doesn’t want to let go. Truth be told, they don’t seem to be here to mock him for it. They were really ready to pound the hell out of John for grabbing Sam.

The cops roll into the parking lot, sirens blaring. John is long gone. Benny doesn’t let Sam go, not even when the police want to question them both, and Sam’s so, so glad.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam can't handle the stress and anxiety anymore.
> 
> (warnings: suicidal thoughts).

Sam’s been here for a while now, and mostly he’s decided he’s staying, but it’s not like it’s a one and done decision. At first it would wake him up in the night, panicking. Maybe he shouldn’t. He _is_  betraying everything his family stands for, after all. Is his happiness worth that?

This isn’t really happiness, he realizes. Safety is worth a lot, but it’s best not to mistake one with the other.

After a while, it stops being the consistent but not constant middle of the night panic and instead morphs to a constant, simmering fear that he’s failing everyone. He likes the Lafittes. He knows they want good things for them. He doesn’t want to fail them. But then there’s his family, and he is concerned about them, about what they want.

It _eats_  him and _eats_ at him, until he gets to the point of thinking– _anything would be better than this_.

And then, the next logical thought comes not that long after. _I wish I didn’t have to deal with any of this_.

 _I wish I was dead_.

He never gets that far, though, although he thinks about it pretty seriously. He considers his options, considers what he knows. Pills, he thinks, and then he thinks about what John would say about Sam choosing pills, the women’s method of choice, the one John would call weak. And that, of course, sends him spiralling all over again.

Still. Pills. Pills because they’re not a gun and while they’ll take just as long if not longer than bleeding out, at least he won’t leave a mess. He might even look peaceful, like he’s sleeping. The Lafittes deserve that.

Let him not marr their lives anymore.

Benny finds the bottle of pills, the ones Sam will eventually be ashamed enough to acknowledge that he stole. He brings them to his parents, and that leads to some tough conversations, where Sam debates running off and choosing another method, any method, quick, done, over.

He doesn’t.

Somehow, it leads to therapy, someone who’s used to dealing with foster kids, even if Sam’s life would be way out of their purview. Still, they listen, once Sam actually decides to talk. They empathize. They care.

The Lafittes do too. They’re their when he’s at home, Benny’s there when he’s at school, and after a while, the eyes on him become more unobtrusive.

“You ain’t alone in this,” Benny tells him.

In some ways, he is, and Sam’s therapist is good at acknowledging that. He’s doing this thing, no one else. He’s the one dealing with it.

But he’s surrounded by people. People who are there. People who care. People who will reassure him in the dead of night that he deserves to live a life free of fear.

And that’s counting for a lot, right then.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam and Benny agree to meet with Dean under friendly terms.

Dean drums his fingers on the tabletop nervously, chipped formica against his fingertips, coffee getting cold next to his hand. They said they’d be there at three. It’s five of, but Dean’s impatient. He’s been here for half an hour, ready.

The bell over the door rings and Dean’s head jerks up. It’s them. Sam and that kid, Benny, with his arm around Sam. It looks territorial, practically, and Dean wonders what that’s about. Maybe it’s just because they’re meeting him, and Benny’s probably smart enough not to trust Dean.

They came, though, and they make their way over to Dean’s table. “Hey, Dean,” Sam says.

“Hey, Sammy.” Then he wonders if he’s allowed to call him Sammy. Sam doesn’t protest though, lets it slide. Dean will be careful.

“Winchester.”

“Lafitte.”

“Why’re we here?” Sam asks, sliding into the booth, Benny following him reluctantly.

“I just…I wanna talk, Sam. I’m…sorry.”

There’s absolute silence for a minute. “You’re…sorry?” Sam checks.

“Sorry,” Dean agrees. “About…everything. Trying to drag you back. Allowing that to happen. I…I miss you, Sam, goddammit, but I get it. I…I’m not gonna lie and I’m not gonna be ashamed. I’ve watched you. You’re happy. Happier than you ever were with us.”

“Winchesters don’t get to be happy,” Sam says, like some long-ago instilled echo.

“Maybe we should. Maybe you’re the one who gets to be,” Dean says.

The waitress interrupts then, and they all order big meals, burgers and fries and bowls of onion rings and shakes. Sam never ate like that when he was with them, Dean realizes.

When the food is done, Sam looks apologetic. “I have..soccer practice,” he says. “So I have to…”

Dean nods. “Right.” There’s no invitation, no extended hand. Not that he expected one.

Benny nudges Sam in the shoulder, then stands up. “Go settle the bill?” he asks. “Be one minute.”

Sam shoots him a suspicious look but Benny just smiles. So Sam leaves, and Benny turns to Dean.

“Call us again, if you’re in the area,” he says. “He’ll probably see ya again, if ya act like this. Be good to him, and he’ll trust ya again. He’s had his world torn apart a few too many times. Help him rebuild it. If ya don’t, though,” and here his expression gets fierce, “If ya hurt him, I’ll tear ya apart.”

Dean doesn’t think the guy could, but he nods anyways. “Got it,” he says. “Enjoy soccer.”

They walk out the door with a little wave. Dean remains at the table, leftovers growing cold, watching them go, wondering when he can get back this way.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam's anxiety gets more pronounced.

Sam’s always been a little…stressed. His parents said it was perfectly normal, understandable, even, given how fucked up his childhood was. He’s anxious about the littlest things, worried about screwing up.

The first time he confided in Benny he was worried he would screw up and the Lafittes would boot his ass out, Benny just about felt his heart break. 

But now, in his junior year, Sam’s anxiety is jumping all over the place. Benny’s a senior, he’s worried about his wrestling scholarship and whether he should dorm at the school or stay at home, but he notices what’s up with Sam.

“Put the damn book down, Sam. Take a break.”

Sam shoots him a dirty look. “ACTs are next week, Benny. I have to study.”

“You already know everything,” Benny complains. Trying to focus, he makes his voice even and reasonable. “Sam. You’ve been studying for two weeks solid, months before that too. You need a break. It’ll just slip out of your head if you go at this rate.”

Sam snorts. “That’s bull. The more I study, the more prepared I’ll be.”

“You’re running yourself ragged. You look like death, kid,” Benny says. “C’mon, what’s worrying you?”

Sam hesitates. “Nothing.”

“Liar.”

“I gotta do well on this, okay? I have to.”

“Why?”

Sam snorts. “Have you seen me? I’m that foster kid. Other kids get to fuck up, but I have to…no one wants me, and your parents have been great, I’m grateful, but I know I have to be worth something, what’s the point of taking in a fuckup kid?”

Benny doesn’t need to hear anymore. Instead, he shouts for his parents, who show up in a minute.

“Sam seems to think you won’t love him anymore if he doesn’t, like, break records on those ACTs,” Benny says.

“Oh, Honey…” their mom says.

“We always love you,” their dad adds.

“So if Sam were to, say, fail everything and never go to college?” Benny leads.

“You’d always be welcome here,” she finishes. She frowns. “But that’s so unlikely. You’re so smart, Sam, you’re going to do just fine…oh, honey, can I hug you?”

Sam ends up hugged for a good long while, and when the adults finally leave–dinner has to be made, and their mom seems intent on it being a big one, as if they’re back to needing to feed Sam up–Benny doesn’t let go of Sam.

He kisses the side of Sam’s head. “You’re amazing, ya know that?” he says. “And we love ya. A lot.”

He calls them their parents but he doesn’t call Sam his brother. Sam’s the same way. Still, that’s probably something for another day.

“Yeah?”

He kisses Sam’s head again. “Always,” he promises, running a soothing hand over Sam’s back.

The ACT book lies forgotten on the floor, and Benny doesn’t let Sam go until they’ve been called for dinner.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Benny goes off to college.

Benny hugs Sam outside the dorm room door. “See ya, kid.”

Sam hugs him tight, like he’s not letting go. “Bye.” It sounds like words unsaid.

Benny squeezes him a bit. “Hey. Ya call me, right?”

“Of course,” Sam says, but it’s guarded.

“I mean it. Call me. Whenever, Sam,” he stresses.

Sam seems to relax into the hug. “Of course,” he repeats.

Mom and Dad and Sam leave, and Benny’s left alone, wondering when Sam will call him first.

* * *

Sam calls. Benny calls. They talk. It’s not like being at home but it’s good.

Sam stresses out over college applications. Benny wishes he could be there to hug him in person.

Right now, the phone will have to do.

* * *

Sam shows up for Benny’s first wrestling match, with Mom and Dad, and, surprisingly…Dean.

“Sorry,” Sam says after. “He was in town and I thought…”

“It’s good,” Benny says, pulling Sam into a hug. Sam doesn’t even complain, no matter how terrible Benny must smell. “Glad he’s making it work.”

They go out to dinner that night, and Sam looks relaxed, happy, sitting next to him all night long.

* * *

Sam’s going to college. He’s going out of state, because he’s a fucking genius and they all knew it. He has a full ride to Stanford, of course he does.

Benny’s been at college for a year, and maybe this makes him a hypocrite, but he’s going to miss Sam so damn much. 

“I’ll still call,” Sam says. “All the time.”

He looks uncertain, like he’s not sure he’s supposed to, but Benny nods enthusiastically.

“Course you will, kid,” he says.

* * *

They have Spring Break together Sam’s first year, and they don’t go home. Instead, they go to Venice Beach, crashing in a shitty hostel.

“Never thought I’d end up here,” Sam says, setting the tequila bottle down.

“You’re tellin’ me.”

“Never thought I’d make it this far alive,” Sam stresses.

Benny feels like his throat is closing up. Maybe it’s the damn alcohol, because he knows that was a legitimate worry in Sam’s life for so long. “Don’t…don’t,” he says. “Ya can’t die on me, Sam.”

“Not planning on it,” Sam says.

“Not allowed,” Benny says.

And then he does something stupid.

He leans forward, sloppily grabs at Sam, and kisses him.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They deal with the fallout.

Sam pulls back. “Benny?”

Benny looks like…well, like a million things at once, then his face shutters. “Sorry. Shit. Sorry. Tequila. Too much…tequila.”

Sam raises an eyebrow. He’s drunk plenty tonight, but even he’s not drunk enough to believe that. “Right,” he says. “Benny, we’ve…fuck,” he says. There’s no good way to say this, he realizes, which leaves just saying it. “This has been here for a while. We just never talk about it. So…you feel something for me?”

“You’re supposed to be my brother,” Benny says heavily, which, Sam notes, is not an answer.

“But I’m not,” Sam says.

“No,” Benny admits after a moment. “You’re something else.”

“Yeah,” Sam says, agreeing. Then he pauses. “What sort of something else?”

“Everythin’ else?” Benny tries.

Sam thinks about it, then accepts it. “Everything else,” he agrees. Then, “Can I…kiss you again? Maybe…actually kiss back this time?”

Benny doesn’t answer, just leans in again, takes Sam’s face in his hands once more–hands still a little shaky from drink, but steadier, more assured now–and kisses him again.

This time, Sam kisses back.

* * *

Going back to school is hard, but perhaps the hardest part is summer vacation, when they both return to the Lafitte house.

They both have part-time jobs that keep them busy, but when many of their old friends are off with sweethearts, they run into a little bit of trouble. There’s only so many times you can hang out with your stepbrother before people question it.

“We gotta tell them soon,” Sam says, in Benny’s bedroom late one night, kissing him softly as they lie on Benny’s bed.

“That’ll go well.”

“It’s that or live like this forever. We can’t hide forever.”

“I know,” Benny sighs. “Righ’ before we go back to school. That way…if there’s problems…we can be gone. Okay?”

“Okay,” Sam agrees, leaning in for another kiss. 

There may very well be problems. But until then, Sam’s going to enjoy what they have, every moment of it.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They tell people

Surprisingly, their parents take it pretty well.

That’s not to say that they take it perfectly at first. There’s a lot of fretting about where they went wrong. They talk about counseling for a bit. But they do come around, and it’s quick enough.

When they ask her, Mrs. Lafitte shrugs. “We always knew, really, that there was somethin’ ‘bout you two boys. At least now we know our boys will be taken care of.”

It ends in a lot of awkward but sincere hugs, but Sam’s so glad it’s out now.

The one who doesn’t take it as well is Dean, who stops by Stanford when he’s in California. There will perhaps always be a bit of a gulf between the two brothers, but they’re working on it. They’re close again. Close enough that Sam wants to tell his brother that he’s in love.

Dean, to say the least, reacts badly.

“How could he?” he snarls, pacing Sam’s tiny dorm room, and Sam is suddenly so glad that his roommate is out with his girlfriend tonight. “Take advantage of you like that.”

“He’s not!” Sam insists hotly. “Dean, we both feel this. We chose this!”

“He’s supposed to be your brother!”

Sam takes what he hopes will be a steadying breath. What a time for Dean to fully embrace Sam’s existence as a member of a second family. “Dean,” he says. “ _You’re_  my brother. The Lafittes are family, but Benny’s…not like you. Never has been. It’s always been something else.”

Dean shakes his head, the look of disgust not abating. “I’m sorry, Sam,” he says. “But I can’t…”

He walks out, leaving Sam alone in his dorm.

* * *

Sam takes a plane to Louisiana, a flight he cannot afford, forcing him to miss classes he probably cannot afford to miss.

Benny lets him in immediately, holds him close, listens to him talk.

“He’ll come ‘round,” he promises.

“How d’you know?” Sam asks.

“Ya two came too far for this to be it,” Benny says. “He’ll get over himself. Sorry he took it out on ya in the meantime, Sam. Ya deserve better.”

Sam misses four classes, but right then, all he really needs is to be held by Benny.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam and Benny start a life together

Benny graduates college with an exuberance of family fanfare. Sam re-arranges finals with two of his professors so he can fly home to be there, cheering louder than anyone else when Benny walks, although their parents come in a close second.

Benny grins at him, cap tilted so far it’s almost falling off his head, robe billowing around him. Once the ceremony’s over, he finds Sam in the crowd and kisses him hard.

“Missed you,” he says.

“Me too,” Sam promises, pulling Benny into another kiss.

Later that night, when they’re back at the place Sam considers home, the Lafittes gentle two-story home, Benny waits until their parents have gone to bed and they’re sitting on the front porch to turn to Sam. “I don’t wanna miss ya anymore.”

“What d'you mean?” Sam asks, smiling. “Benny, I have to finish school. I’m sorry, but…”

“Shh, Sugar, slow down,” Benny soothes. “I don’t mean ya to stop school. Never. Ya belong there, ya worked hard. We both know it. Just that, when next year starts…how’d ya feel ‘bout an off campus apartment? For two?”

“You…really mean that?” Sam checks, his heart beating a million miles a minute. No more midnight phone calls and wishing selfishly for more. No more missing Benny and coordinating schedules to video call. “You wouldn’t be doing it just for me, right? You’re okay with California?”

“Hear California’s lovely,” Benny says. “There’s a lot of opportunities out there.”

Sam smiles so hard his face hurts. Then he leans so far forward he’s essentially in Benny’s lap, and kisses him for all he’s worth.

Two months later, they’re back in Palo Alto. Their tiny little apartment is finally furnished, and Benny took care of the groceries with Sam tagging along behind, carrying bags home. Sam’s class schedule is set. The bed is made.

Benny’s cooking on their new stove, and Sam just stands in the middle of the place, looking around over and over again.

“This has to be the stupidest thing I’ve ever done,” he says.

“Why you say that?” Benny asks, and even without looking Sam knows he freezes in his cooking. Worried, probably.

“Just…seems too good to be true,” Sam admits. “Too damn happy.”

Benny seems to abandon the stove and instead wraps his arms around Sam from behind. “I sincerely hope you’re always this happy with me,” he says.

Sam grins and turns around to kiss him again, thinking about the kid terrified moving into the Laffites house. Not sure where he belonged, not sure how long he’d get to stay. And that boy who made damn sure he was safe there, welcome. And where they are today.

He kisses Benny harder.


End file.
